Q: What is the range of a tuba?
A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm.

Q: What's a tuba for?
A: 1 1/2 X 3 1/2.

Q: There are two tubaplayers sitting in a car. Who's driving?
A: The policeman

Tuba Player: Did you hear my last recital?
Friend: I hope so.

Q: How many tuba players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three: one to hold the bulb and two to drink until the room spins.

Q: How do you fix a broken tuba?
A: With a "tuba glue."