My other wife is beautiful.
My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him!
My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me.Gosh, I'm going to miss her.
My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.
Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife. - PJ O'Rourke
No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. - Honore de Balzac
Nothing says loving like marrying your cousin! - Al Bundy
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.